Millennials: Is it really all about the Journey?

Recently, I had someone tell me that the millennial generation likes a church that gives them an experience, and how it's all about the journey or experience for them.  I have read articles about getting millennials into the church and engaging them etc... but it isn't just about the millennial generation, all people are looking for an experience or a journey to make their life complete.

The age we live in teaches us to want to depend on others to give us that experience, or journey that we are looking for.  We live in an entitled, narcissistic world and it really is all about "what can you do for me" "what are you going to do for me" and "pastor, this is what I need".

Some might even argue, as far as church goes, it's always been this way, each person in the congregation is a little inward, searching for what best suits them,  and that JOURNEY that they want to experience. It is a carnal,  human condition to try and take care of #1 - SELF,
and has been for ages.

But, is it really all about the Journey?  What about the Destination?

In Hosea 7:14, the Bible talks about Israel, but couldn't it be anyone who is not following him the way that he wants?
 God wants all of you, not just the part of you that you give him on Sunday morning while you look for that experience or journey to suit you and make your life complete. Israel could not just be happy following God, they were looking, searching, and trying to experience more. It was hard for them to be still and recognize God, and that their destiny was their destination, that all they had to do was look up.

"They do not cry out to me with sincere hearts, Instead, they sit on their couches and wail. They cut themselves begging foreign gods for bread and new wine, and they turn away from me" Hosea 7:14 NLT

What about the destination? The destination is that you don't have to keep searching for that perfect group, that perfect church.

The truth is that you have it, if you are a child of God, you have reached your destination........
You are the church, you are the missing piece of the puzzle to make right where you are awesome and great.   

Now I ask you what are YOU going to do to make the world a better place?
Stop searching for your destiny, stop looking for some magical journey to fill the void in you, that void, that desire is God speaking to you, to tell you to live in the moment.  Stop searching and start doing.
Work for him, where you are.  Embrace your destination, seek God and he will show you what you need to be doing, right where you are.

If you look for me whole heartedly, you will find me. Jeremiah 29:13

The Need Within

I was in meditation the other day and praying and thinking about life when God revealed something to me, or reminded me or whatever we would like to call it. I was thinking of the turmoil that we get in with our mates, our friends, our family and how so very different we are. Like when we give our heart away how bad it hurts when turmoil sneaks in. When you love someone and share your life, your love and yourself with them they become a part of you and imagining life without them is hard.

I also began to think how it is very hard for two people to get along, to live in complete harmony, because we are so different. I think about when people get divorced or couples break up and the pain and turmoil that you see, the homes that are broken and the lives that are shattered. The Bible tells us to guard our hearts, and I think it is for that very reason. Our carnal self looks only for pleasure and to fulfill the lust of the flesh( a need for comfort), not just a physical affair or something like that, but that part of us that needs validating as well, that part of us that just cannot stay settled and content with what we have. The very depths of our soul is unsettled and always seeking to better things, to better ourselves to better others, to have more, do more and want more. We set goals and are insistent  on reaching them or else. We know what we need and if that need isn't met by something or someone then we look elsewhere, we search, we seek, we want.  It's the human condition. The weak part of us that feels need.......maybe the answer to life is knowing this about ourselves, yet choosing the right path regardless, choosing to be content in all circumstance.

Don't get me wrong, I do believe we should have goals and better ourselves but if those goals make you live a life of turmoil or stress and it seems you are always striving and dis-content maybe you need to stop and reflect for a while and seek something bigger.

God tells us in his word that he wants to meet our needs- all those needs I wrote above, but we know that it cannot be that simple. We need something more tangible, more real, so we continue to seek.

11 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therein to be content. 12 I know how to be abased, and I know also how to abound: in everything and in all things have I learned the secret both to be filled and to be hungry, both to abound and to be in want. 13 I can do all things in him that strengtheneth me.  Phil 4:11-13

In the end, once you have read HIS word and you know his word, all the scriptures point back to one thing. God wants us to live with people not isolated, not alone,  he wants us to have that human connection, to tolerate others, to love others, to love the unlovable. We are so very different, really it's the depths of OUR own hearts that matter to HIM. The challenge and victory of life is being able to live in that content frame of mind realizing that it's not all about "ME".

Privilege - An Open Letter to my Daughters

Danny recently began a sermon series on privilege.  I really began to think about how blessed we truly are in America and also how spoiled we are.
We take the privileges we have for granted. If I tell my girls, no we are not going out to eat again, or no I am not buying this or that right now, I get " are we poor" I have to explain, no I am trying to budget. I have had the talk with them as well, no we are not poor, but we are not rich, we are somewhere in between. It is really all about perspective.  Some of my own family back home would think that we are rich, but some of your friends at school who travel abroad for breaks etc, may think we are poor.

Regardless of finances, I just want to write this open letter to my girls about privilege.

Recently - I applied for a job and was concerned if I would even get it because I did not meet the Diverse criteria that they were looking for. I had been working for the company for 3 years and had experience with the computer system, and knew the ropes and I finished up my advanced degree and just wanted a promotion, but if someone out there who was more diverse than me with less experience applied they could potentially oust me out of the running for the job. This concerned me and then I realized this is only going to get worse, my poor children. .....

 Girls,
    I am sorry I raised you so that you don't have to worry about food, shelter, or basic needs, because if any of those were threatened you might appreciate more of the basic things in life.

I am sorry you are caucasian and from a middle income family because you will be set aside for jobs because you are not more ethnic and diverse.

You are women and you are beautiful and this my friend will cause people to judge your ability, your sincerity and even your intellect. But you come from a long line of smart, strong beautiful women, you can handle it.

I cannot apologize because you were raised with Christian values and go to a Christian church. But you will be ridiculed and picked on for any of this and later accused of being closed minded if you ever tell anyone, but be aware. Even if you are open minded, the very words Christian causes others to judge you.  You could even be shunned, picked over for jobs and talked about even amongst your peers for this one. Stand strong in your faith, be proud, because at the end of the day, God will be the one holding your hand and giving you peace and rest to sleep and begin again.

Bottom line is that you are privileged, no you do not feel privileged because you cannot have everything you want, we don't get to do long vacations and cruises every year, and travel abroad each summer. You want to do extracurricular activities that I cannot always afford, and you have to do chores around the house, and help out at church on Sundays because your dad is the pastor and always be prepared at any second to accept someone in your home, your private space,  because that is what pastors' families do. No, you may not feel privileged,  but you are.

Though you may suffer some because you are a Christian and because we are not rich according to  our immediate World's standards but we are rich according to most of the world's standards as a whole, I cannot begin to explain it, but as you live and travel you will see just how fortunate you are.

We are privileged, you are privileged and you have the amazing opportunity to know Jesus Christ, to be around his people and to know the comfort of having two parents that love you dearly.
As you start to experience the world and see that you are truly the minority don't shrink back and feel less, don't hide your light because you are not diverse enough or liberal enough.... be the person we are raising you to be .. beautiful, loving, real, strong, and Christ like... because in the end the things that matter will still be the things that are important, all the rest is just part of life in a privileged, self-seeking, society. So be strong, stand strong and be proud of who you are.

Why do we Judge?

In my wisdom of life, I have learned that we all judge others. It's not just that "religious co-worker" that is lurking around the water cooler with a smirk on their face that judges. It's the liberal co-worker who right to your face judges you and everyone else who does not live or act or say what in their opinion is "the right way to live".

You see we are humans and humans judge others.  We form these opinions and from our opinions and knowledge in this world we choose to look at others through those same glasses. You know the ones we are wearing and the thoughts that we have and the convictions that we personally experience. We often tend to think others should think and see like we do, but it isn't so.  When we realize this fact, we often jump into the miry pit of judging others.

Sometimes it's just a simple mis-understanding and we see something and jump to conclusions, other times we get ideas in our head and twist them without even realizing it, but we do it.

We are all so very different each and every one but because we are also so very relational and created by our Creator to be relational then we want everyone to see it our way, we want to be like others, we want others to be like us, because it makes us feel connected and not so lonely.

I want to challenge you the next time you feel or catch yourself judging another to pause, and think about their motives, think about the person and accept them for who they are.... Accept them for being different, accept them for thinking different, accept them.  My friend,  that is love in it's finest form, to accept others for who they are and not for who you want or think they should be. If they are not living like they should or doing like you think they should, pray for them, smile and love them.

We can change this world together through love.

Gomerisms

In my Hosea Bible study, today is about Gomerisms. 

What is a Gomerism? 

Like Israel, we are very capable of bad choices, falling away, and bad habits. 

In Hosea 2: 2 

“ But now bring charges against Israel-your mother- 

for she is no longer my wife, and I am no longer her husband

Tell her to remove her prostitute’s make up from her face and the clothing that exposes her breasts.

Why are we similar? Well we don’t always see God as husband ,there is not love there, there is only a submissive attitude such as a master or Lord instead of love. 

Though we should see him as Lord, there is a fine balance that includes LOVE not just submission but a reciprocity of LOVE and LOVE is a motivator. 

As I studied on, we were to read some scriptures and then put our interpretation beside them, then put our culture equivalent then put a % by what we struggle with , then write about the one with the largest % and talk about it with someone.  

Though I may struggle or have struggled with all of them, I picked the second one, mis-directing my worship which was originally Hosea 4:12 which if you read some Bible versions of it, you are like …. HUH? but it was great the way this writer (Jennifer Rothschild) help  me go through it and decipher how it could relate to the here and now. 

Hosea 4:12 (ASV) 

My people ask counsel at their stock, and their staff declareth unto them; for the spirit of whoredom hath cause them to err, and they have played the harlot, departing from under their God. ( Though I do not consult with idols or a “diviners rod” {psychic} I may as well if I am not consulting with God through giving him my time and worship. )

Though I don’t struggle with leaving God, or departing from him, I struggle with focus. I slowly allow other things to get in between me and my time alone with God, my worship, my quite time and before long, “I am mis-directing my worship” and serving other Gods… 

What are my potential God’s ? Biggest err, or form of whoredom is trusting in self-selfism ( I can do this) Which is ultimately a lack of faith and not trusting in God who is bigger and way more equipped to handle even the smallest of problems. 

Selfism

Family

Career

School 

Social Media 

What is your Gomerisim? What do you struggle with?  Are you trusting God like a Master that sits on a throne or are you treating him like a husband with love and trust? 

Gomerisms put us on the wrong path as they did the Israelites. We get so side-tracked and inward focused that we loose site of what we should be doing and who we are….. 

We are HIS…. and we should live like it. I am loved, I am accepted, I am complete !!!

 (Rom 9:24-26)

The Loneliest Day

While we know the crucifixion of Christ was horrible,  the day before when he knew his destiny and experienced the betrayal and hurt and loneliness of being Christ, must have been hard as well.

Have you ever felt betrayed? Well, Christ certainly did.....

We read Mark 14 in Life Group the other night and it resonated with me in a different way than usual.

Not only had he just left the Lords supper and knew someone had betrayed him, he also asked the disciples to stay awake and watch in  the garden and they fell asleep,

Then he spoke about Peter about to betray him also.

I have thought about this scripture and the fact that Jesus had to face his destiny in the garden of Gethsemane and anguished over it and accepting our sin, but I have never thought about how he knew Peter was going to betray him, Judas betrayed him. Some of his closest friends, his disciples, men he had poured into, and given himself to, betrayed him, fell asleep, hid and forgot him so easily.  People he had walked closely with, just forgot him so easily, but even more had complete disregard for all the teaching and warning and sovereignty of God.  To me, it had to be the Loneliest day, that day in the garden.  While going to the cross and all that pain was hard, facing it, and realizing the betrayal, the hurt and sin, must have been the loneliest day.

I can only expect that this hurt him and made him feel alone, and lonely that day. Not only did he know his destiny, he also knew that though he had poured so much into these guys, that they would betray him and not be by his side at all.

They lived with him and talked with him and walked with him yet betrayed him at the last minute...
Aren't we so much like the disciples....

 We all look at Judas as the bad guy, and while he was pretty pathetic, the other disciples were not much better.  I am not much better..... you are not much better, we betray Jesus and let him down daily.


We make promises to the Lord, then we just fall asleep and get over taken by this world and sometimes just forget about him. Then we wake up and we are just wandering in the wilderness like the Israelites.

Then sometimes, we are doing things for the Lord, serving, worshiping and before long we are not even worshiping him in our spirit. Its like the scripture says we worship him with our mouths but our hearts are far from him because we have busied our lives up so much with good things, but it's still too busy for God.

“‘These people honor me with their lips, but their heart is far from me;" Matt 15:8

All those extra things....

I like Facebook and social media, I feel that it connects us to friends far and wide and family from a distance and it has great uses to push agendas and political views etc... but all in all it is a time stealer. I see so many events, concerts and other things that I would like to go to but cannot.

Being a Pastor's wife of a church plant is not an easy job in discerning balance of God first, family & church. 'Being all things to all people' is no easy feat, but it is an amazing journey for sure! 

I find it hard to just do the things I am suppose to do with my family and my girls, and my husband and my church and any thing extra is an extra thing. There are extra events that one must discern and weigh out what is the best use of my time. Who is this impacting, or helping or is it feeding my own selfish desires?. Is it giving me needed down time or escape from reality time? Is it constructive and beneficial?

I have started praying that God will help me use each and every minute of my time constructive and beneficial to His Kingdom.

One thing I learned from 2015 is that life is short, life is fragile and the sting of death hurts.


Make the time count, make the days count. Let the people around you know they are important and they are loved.

We live in a fast paced society and as technology increases, our lives will continue to go at a faster pace. We must hold on to the things that matter, hold your loved one's close, and invest in others.

The term providing for your family has many meanings, just remember that providing for your family is more than just clothes, food, and shelter. That weighs the most on me, not the physical, or material things, but the internal, the actions of Love,  the meaningful stuff.... Am I doing enough? Am I intentional enough? Am I covering it all ? Then I realize there is no way to cover it all. There will be something along the way my children blame me for and I will never be perfect, but when I feel that way, I go and sit at the feet of Jesus and I pray for His strength to guide me.  I realize " I can do all things through Him" Phil 4:13... and I go on and keep on keeping on....

"Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God." Rom 8:27

I will leave you with my devotion that spoke clearly to my heart this morning and hopefully it will to yours as well.

"We run ahead of Him in a thousand and one activities, consequently we get so burdened with persons and with difficulties that we do not worship God, we do not intercede. If once the burden and pressure come upon us and we are not in the worshipping attitude, it will produce not only hardness toward God but despair in our own souls" ~ Oswald Chambers

Be ready, stay in Him by reading his word and praying, seek him daily. Paul said he had to die daily and renew daily. Try that.

So when I get burdened, I am reminded of God's love, and sovereignty and sometimes I just have to sit as his feet...... try it.

Go to Him today, give all to HIM !